Toucher & Hardy

Toucher & Hardy

Toucher & Hardy

Toucher & Rich producer Nick Gemelli is now a father and the news has Fred Toucher up in arms.

Fred claims that nobody likes him or tells him anything, but is unwilling to send the first text. Is he right? Or, should he take initiative and reach out to his close friend?


  • TR

    (Credit: Nick Gemelli)

  • Rich: Nick is at home right now. He’s with his newborn baby—

    Fred: —which he’s not contacted me at all about.

    Rich: Have you contacted him?

    Fred: No, I’m waiting for him to contact me.

    Rich: Why would he contact you? He’s busy. Contact him.

    Fred: He’s sitting at home. If anyone’s not busy, it’s him.

  • nick

  • Rich: Why is he supposed to reach out to you? What’s he supposed to say? ‘Hey, Fred, I have a baby now!’ You’re supposed to say, ‘Hey, congratulations! You have a baby!’ 

    Fred: No, he should send me a picture of the baby and say, like— 

    Rich: —you haven’t said congrats to him yet? 

    Fred: Absolutely not. 

    Rich: It’s been like five days. 

    Fred: Well, first of all, he didn’t even tell us he had a kid. I’m realizing no one likes me. No one tells me anything. 

    He didn’t even tell any of us that he had the kid. We just put two and two together, and his dad called in to tell us he had the kid. 

    Based on our relationship, Nick and I are close. I mean, I pay him to put things together at my house. 

    Rich: You give him $50 every once in a while. 

    Fred: $100. Okay. 

    Rich: That’s right. How dare I think it was cheaper than that. 

    Fred: It’s 100 bucks for 3 hours—that ain’t so bad—more like two-and-a-half hours. And if it were anyone else, it would probably be an hour. 

    Nick should send me a picture of the baby, text me and go, like, ‘Hey, Fred, look, here is the baby.’

    Then I text back, ‘Oh, what a wonderful looking baby. Congratulations!’ Then I would send him a baby gift. 

  • fred

  • Rich: The way it works is that you usually contact the person and tell them congratulations because where does it end? Who else does he have to contact? Does he have to call everybody he knows? 

    Fred: I’m walking through life thinking that people like me. No one likes me. I’m dead serious. I’m walking through life thinking that I’m cool to everyone. Everyone’s texting each other. I’m not involved in these texts. I don’t know what I’m doing. 

    Wallach: Take the initiative and text Nick. 

    Fred: I don’t want to text Nick because I think he’s not busy. All he has is time on his hands—time that he’s probably not sleeping because of the kid, but still time on his hands. You’re just sitting around 20 hours a day with nothing to do.

  • Full Segment

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