$750,000 cash in hand.
A bigger hell I can’t imagine.
Two bad, borderline unwatchable teams in a city I despise.
But I know I’m in the minority.
I know that every Pats bro (including some very friends of mine) was frothing at the mouth back in the spring for the schedule to drop, so they could book their flights for THE Patriots road game of the year.
THE PATS! IN VEGAS, KID!
If I’m going to go to a city in this wonderful country of ours that promises and delivers on debauchery, I’m going to New Orleans every single time.
And sure, New Orleans might be dangerous (and frighteningly so!) but at least that place is genuine and has some soul.
It’s the complete opposite.
I hate it.
It’s plastic, fake, trashy and there’s way, way too many gross people.
And if you’re into it, as a guy, past the age of like 30?
You’re into it for only two reasons.
Cocaine and Hookers.
So besides that, here’s what else you should look to do in that vapid snake pit this weekend.