Boston Bruins

May 3, 2019; Raleigh, NC, USA; Carolina Hurricanes head coach Rod Brind’Amour talks to the press after the game against the New York Islanders in game four of the second round of the 2019 Stanley Cup Playoffs at PNC Arena. The Carolina Hurricanes defeated the New York Islanders 5-2. Mandatory Credit: James Guillory-USA TODAY Sports

By Ty Anderson,

Sometimes the jokes just write themselves.

There was Hurricanes coach Rod Brind’Amour, answering questions about yet another defeat at the hands of the Bruins, who took a commanding 3-0 series lead behind a marvelous performance from Tuukka Rask on Tuesday night, and trying to explain how his team would regroup. Brind’Amour, who has tried to say almost everything a coach can to keep morale high, just outright admitted that what the Hurricanes are going through right now “sucks.”

He compared their Game 3 loss to getting hit in the penis.

He was basically giving you everything you want out of a sad-yet-pissed head coach, and lamenting Carolina’s power-play shortcomings, which somehow went 0-for-5 by the night’s end.

“It’s been a bit of an Achilles’ heel here all year from my point of view,” Brind’Amour said of his team’s power play, which is now 1-for-12 in the series. “You got to score on those. Five-on-three you’ve got to score. Playoffs, especially, you don’t get that many good looks in a game. That’s one where you’ve got to find the back of the net.”

Then “Yakety Sax” hit.

You could’ve heard a pin drop (well, if not for “Yakety Sax” and all) as dozens of reporters and photographers suddenly looked around to find out who was about to lose their life before our very eyes. Speaking selfishly and as a fan of chaos, I’ve never wanted to John Tortorella to be in the same room as me more than I did at that very moment. I wanted blood.

Instead, we all moved on with our night, and that ringtone will now be repurposed for Dougie Hamilton highlights.

Ty Anderson is a writer and columnist for He has also been a voting member of the Boston Chapter of the Professional Hockey Writers’ Association since 2013. Any opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of 98.5 The Sports Hub, Beasley Media Group, or any subsidiaries. Yell at him on Twitter: @_TyAnderson.